AAARRRRRGGGGHHHHH!

Have you ever felt like screaming out loud?  I do.  Every time the phone rings and another random 866 or out of state number shows on the caller ID.  Or when I go to the mailbox and see another stack of bills and late notices that I can't pay.

Despite how this all sounds, I have a job.  A rather good job comparatively considering the financial crisis.  But I still can't seem to make ends meet.  Every month, my checking account is overdrawn and some bills are left unpaid until the next month.  I feel so guilty.  My son deserves better, but I know that at least for the time being, he's got a full belly and a roof over his head at night. 

Alright, so maybe I shouldn't be that frustrated.  Maybe I should just be grateful for the fact that I'm able to continue to barely keep my head above water.  Please don't get me wrong, I do realize that things could be much, MUCH worse.  As I mentioned in the "About Me" portion of the blog... this is just me, venting.  After I vent, I can see the glass as half full again.  :) 

Our power was turned off last week.  I hadn't paid that bill in a couple of months, but the day before I had electronically scheduled the bill to be paid in full, the power was shut off.  I was in tears.  Correction... I was furious, angry, embarrassed, and then tears.  I cried in front of my son for the first time.  He, in turn, began crying because I was crying.  But, after a whole 45 seconds of tears, I finally came to a state of acceptance.  I was immediately on the phone.  I had to float an electronic check until the next day.  Unfortunately, this all didn't occur until after 6:30 PM.  The service people worked until 9:00 PM, so I had a slim chance that power could be back on before then.  But it didn't turn out that way.  Fortunately, I had enough time to scramble around and look in the moving boxes for candles and/or working flashlights.  Came up with about half a dozen candles and two camping lanterns.  So we weren't completely in the dark and fortunately, I have a gas stove.  So dinner and bathing by candlelight.  Shuttled my son off to a friends house for the evening because I had to work the night shift.  Power was restored at 8:30 AM the following day.

Now, my power bill is overpaid, so I shouldn't have to worry about that one for another couple of months!